How to Get a Good Night's Rest Despite Stress Over Money

 How to Get a Good Night's Rest Despite Stress Over Money

Part of the book "How to sleep without pills"

A young, driven man, the owner of a modest ice cream and candy shop, was married to Mrs. D., a typically upbeat girl, and he was intent on turning it into something big. But no matter how many hours I put in at the store, I only made a few dollars. Whether they would be able to keep the store open or not was an ongoing concern.

Mrs. D. discovered that money appeared to permeate her entire life after six years of cutting back, especially now that she had three children to support. She would stay up thinking about their misfortune whenever they had even a little financial setback.

Although Mrs. D. would readily acknowledge that these occurrences were little, they all appeared to be the final straw. She had to pay for a library book that had fallen in a mud pool; that night, she stayed up translating the money into food and shoes for the kids. The arrival of the gas bill, the misplacement of a glove, and the overcharging of a nickel by a shopkeeper were enough to plunge her into a pit of despair and leave her unable to sleep.

The answer is

Perhaps no other single cause has kept more people up at night than financial worries. People who are well-off fret about parting with their cash, while others who are short on funds fret about amassing more of it.

Losing half a million dollars is likely to hurt just as much as losing a job can hurt a father of six children. Maybe his pain is greater. As soon as they lost everything in the stock market crisis, the millionaires were the ones who jumped from high-rise office buildings. Still, they weren't any poorer than the typical working-class guy who has no money and finds the thought of suicide funny, even if they were bankrupt.

Wealth, in and of itself, is relative. A lot of people want what you have, even if you're in a poor situation, according to an old saying. There are millions of people in Asia and Europe who would gladly swap places with the lowest-income American. I informed Mrs. D. about this and brought up the fact that in India, it is a daily ritual to collect the bodies of starving people from the streets; nevertheless, if someone were to steal her trash can contents, riots would break out. Plus, I informed her that a Hungarian lady might be envious of Mrs. D.'s tranquility because she doesn't have to fear that the secret police will kidnap her husband one night.

Even in the United States, being poor is a major problem; thus, we should all work hard and smart to improve our financial situation. Restless worrying, on the other hand, will impede such endeavors and make accomplishment much more elusive.

Mrs. D. was more irritated than impressed when I told her these facts. She explained, "Listen, I'm aware that there are people in worse situations than me, but that doesn't guarantee that I will have enough to eat or a roof over my head. She chimed in angrily, "Should I just sing my heart out all day since I'm broke?"

I kind of told her that that was the right thing for her to do. Get up and sing! I don't see why not. She was hurting herself emotionally by going about moping.

A lesson in positive attitude was necessary before Mrs. D. could start singing in public. I had her compile a list of all her possessions and debts to help me with this. The following were the assets: Her kids were perfectly healthy and typical. Her spouse was in good health. She seemed OK. Affectionate feelings were reciprocated by her spouse. Her spouse had many admirers. She has many admirers. Many people were her friends. Academically, her children excelled. Her spouse was really young.

The burden of poverty weighed heavily on these possessions. It was only their poverty that held them back. According to Mrs. D., everything would be alright if they had some money, and it wouldn't take much. Because, as Mrs. D. noted: They weren't moving ahead—that is, saving money—being impoverished concerned and scared her and gave her sleepless nights. They appeared doomed to perpetual poverty. Should an unexpected expense arise, they lacked the necessary funds. Their children's college education was not funded. Long has passed since any of them had last purchased new garments. The constant counting of her pennies had worn her down. If she tried to amuse her companions, she would fail miserably. They risk losing the clientele. Next month, they may be unable to cover their expenses. Mrs. D was more concerned about their financial stability in the long run than she was about meeting their current demands.

Doubts like these may never come true. All of Mrs. D.'s worries may come true if she let her thoughts turn her into a neurotic, fearful person who is an inspiration to her husband rather than an inspiration herself; defeatism is contagious.

I told Mrs. D. to stop worrying about money and focus on her strengths. Thinking, "I am fortunate to have such healthy children" or "I am fortunate to have such a fine husband," rather than, "We'll never have money for the children's college education," was to be her mental attitude while she baked the cake.

You have to intentionally think in this way until it becomes automatic—this is conditioned thinking. When anxiety sets in, nothing else will help. Just like any other behavior, worrying may be overcome by developing a new habit: thinking positively.

I taught Mrs. D. the ABC Round Robin and the Sleep Exercise, and I also made sure she got into the habit of thinking positively. During our time together, I showed her how to sneak in a little nap whenever she needed a break from the day's activities.

After she realized that the course I offered was the only one that would meet her needs, she proved to be an excellent student. It was astonishing to her that thinking on the positive aspects of her life made her feel elated. Previously, Mrs. D. would rather sleep than spend hours fretting over money. Consequently, she is in a better position to advise her husband on financial matters so he can increase his income.

IN A SNAP

If you're worried about money and can't sleep:Praise God instead of counting sheep. Make a list of everything wonderful that is happening in your life. Start with naming a neighbor you wouldn't want to exchange places with if you're really feeling down and out and can't think of anyone else. Take Mrs. R., for example; she's wealthy but has an abnormal child. A good example would be Mr. Z., who is constantly being bothered by his wife. Additionally, Mrs. Y.'s husband is a drinker. "My husband doesn't drink," "My wife understands me," or "My child is normal and healthy" are all things that might be written down as blessings.Budgetary talks should take place at designated times. Before tackling a problem, give yourself as much time as you need to think it through thoroughly; nevertheless, refrain from thinking about money during other times. Reminding yourself of your many assets will help you shift your negative thoughts regarding money to a more positive frame of mind. It will help you feel better if you do this faith totally.Master the ABC Swap. When you find yourself with a few moments to spare throughout the day, use it to help you relax. You will naturally have better sleep quality at night if you maintain an optimistic and relaxed attitude throughout the day.To help you fall asleep at night, practice the Sleep Exercise after you've done the Robin. Just before you go off to sleep, say a few more blessings to yourself. When you wake up, you'll be surprised by how much happy you feel.Keep in mind that you shouldn't wallow in self-pity over your financial situation; being poor is awful and no one wants to be poor. Instead, focus on finding ways to improve your situation. You will have accomplished much in alleviating your illness if you train your mind to be hopeful.


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